How to Dump your Boyfriend in 10 days !!

My friends and I were discussing movies over lunch today and the conversation turned to chick flicks. Bridget Jones diary definitely tops my list on that one..everybody else had their own choice of movies.

One movie which sounded interesting (sounded coz i haven't watched it) was how to lose a guy in 10 days. The whole idea seemed quite interesting..a dating guide in the reverse...things that one shouldn't do in a relationship....the movie promised to be mighty hilarious.While everyone excitedly started making plans of watching it on our next sleepover, gripped by Blogomania all I could think of was how this would actually make a great blog post. I could use all the expertise I have gained in this area..some thru my own experience and others through the experiences of others (finally all those years spent playing agony aunt are paying off!!)

So hold your breath as Shanu proudly presents:

How to Dump your Boyfriend in 10 days

Yeah Dosti hum jaroor todenge: Pester him to introduce you to his friends. Once he relents and introduces you, you have a variety of tactics at your disposal.

Tactic 1: Pick the cutest guy in the group and start talking to him. For better results take his cell number and call him to talk about nothing. If your boyfriend calls, tell him you

cant talk because you are busy talking to his friend.

Tactic 2: Right after you meet them, tell him how you think they

are not right for him. Choose random people from your Orkut friend list and ask him to send them friend requests. If he protests start crying and say that you are only trying to help him.

Preparation time: 1-2 weeks of pestering; Additional 2 weeks for Tactic 1

Difficulty: Medium

Probability of scaring the guy away: Medium

Probability of a fight (which could be used to dump the guy):High

Wherever you go, my network follows: Call him every 2 hours and message him every 15 mins. If he doesn't answer your calls, increase the frequency of calls. Works best if he is in an important meeting.

One of my friend's GF called him 40 times in 30 minutes. Try beating that record.

Preparation time: None

Difficulty: Medium

Probability of scaring the guy away: High

Probability of a fight :Very High

Har Rang kuch kehta hai: Buy a new dress and ask your BF to guess the colour. I was lucky(??) to be privy to one of such conversations.

She: I bought a new dress today..Guess whats the colour?

He:Umm..Green?

She:Ankhin kaunta rang asto?? (This is in marathi..when translated means - What other colour can you guess)

He:Blue

She:Ankhin kaunta rang asto??

He:Black

She:Ankhin kaunta rang asto??

You get the gist don't you??

The conversation between my friend and her BF continued for 2 hours at the end of which the guy was out of colours and yet he hadn't guessed the right one. How could he, when the colour was a cross between tomato red and lotus pink??

Preparation time: High - also involves cost of the dress.

Difficulty: Low

Probability of scaring the guy away: Low

Probability of a fight :Low

Weighty matters (to be used with the earlier point for best results): Wear a new dress and ask him "Do you think I look fat??"

Variations include asking him "Do you think my best friend Meera is pretty?", "Does this haircut make me look younger?"

Research shows men haven't been able to figure out an answer to these yet..and if your BF answers these questions convincingly..think again..maybe u shouldn't be dumping him after all.

Preparation time: None

Difficulty: Low

Probability of scaring the guy away: High

Probability of a fight :Very High

Phone a friend: Call all the girls in his phone book and casually ask them if they were dating him. If they answer in negative demand to know why. Do they feel he isn't boyfriend material?

If they answer in positive ask them if they are still in touch and use the details to pick up a fight with your BF.

Preparation time: Medium

Difficulty: High

Probability of scaring the guy away: High

Probability of a fight :Very High

Take an interest in his interests and do the exact opposite: I don't need to explain this now do I?

Preparation time: None

Difficulty: Medium

Probability of scaring the guy away: Medium

Probability of a fight :High

Tell your friends intimate details about your relationship: This is a gr8 way of losing not only ur bf but also ur best friends...the nastier the details shared, the better. When you introduce him to your friends ask them to look at him and giggle. When he asks why..tell him its just a small secret and laugh some more.

Preparation time: None

Difficulty: Low

Probability of scaring the guy away: High

Probability of a fight :Very High

I hope these tips are as useful to you as they were to my countless friends...Any other suggestions are welcome.