The conspiracy theory….!

I am destiny’s favorite child. I am just not saying it. I have ample evidence to prove it. In fact, I sometimes feel that whenever God feels like having a good laugh, he turns his attention to me. And trust me, He isn’t the only one who ends up feeling amused.I do not believe in conspiracy theories but a couple of incidents over the last few days have got me questioning my beliefs.

Evidence 1: I am standing on the divider, waiting for the traffic to slow down so that I can cross the road when a water tanker decides to ramble by. I was, by some quirk of fate, standing next to the speed breaker. I don’t think I need to explain what happened next. The tanker hit the speed breaker and water whooshed out drenching me completely from head to toe. My perfectly blow-dried hair was dripping and people around were laughing at my sorry sight.

I was on my way to a much awaited lunch date with a school friend (I had already ditched her 6 times that month and couldn’t cancel the lunch yet again) and decided to go ahead with my wet look. While the waiter was kind enough to suppress his smile, my friend’s giggles betrayed the fact that the ‘wet look’ just didn’t suit me.

Evidence 2: Come monsoons and all roadside shops start getting covered with huge plastic sheets to protect their wares from the onslaught of the rains. I was walking towards the cake shop, minding my own business, when suddenly a strong gust of wind dislodges the plastic sheet covering a stall and it comes and lands right on top of me. Suddenly everything turns pitch dark and I try to find my way out of while everyone else does what they do best – laugh at my plight. By the time I am out of it, I am completely drenched and covered with yucky mud. I bravely walk into the cake shop and buy a cake and scram out.

These might seem like relatively harmless one off incidents to you but trust me; my days are filled with such incidents. From getting stuck on an escalator, to tripping over my shoelaces to accidentally sending a not so polite message to my boss I have done it all. I have been embarrassed so many times that nothing embarrasses me anymore (naah I am lying, infact being embarrassed so many times has helped me perfect the art of blushing). Infact my embarrassments are so frequent that everyday when I reach home, my mom greets me with a question “Aaj kasa maja zali? (What fun happened to you today?)”

Now if that isn’t a conspiracy what is?

(Suffering from a major major case of writers block; God..I miss my blogomania :( )